While I’m resting now from studying cause I had a really non productive stressful day, I’m watching Greys Anatomy, and it’s about izzie basically, the one when she came back to the hospital for the first time after Denny died and there was the m and m, discussing how he died and they all had a different story line for that, I suddenly paused in a middle of a scene,
This one, this is how it goes
IZZIE: I have 8 million dollars.
CHIEF: So I’ve heard
IZZIE: I can do anything I want.
CHIEF: Just about.
IZZIE: And all I really want to do is a running whip stitch.
CHIEF: My first year as an intern, I had a stable cardiac patient who blew out his lung while I was transporting him to CT. I called in a code, but by the time everyone got there, he was dead. If I’d have put in a chest tube right away…
IZZIE: You made a mistake
CHIEF: I made a mistake. But I stayed. I worked. I learned. I never made that mistake again. If I’d have quit, all I would have had is that life that I lost. Instead I get to save lives. Every day, I get to save lives.
And I don’t know, cause Right now I too am in the verge of quitting, but, this really got me, I literally paused and think things … I don’t know how to explain this, but I don’t know… just… I don’t want to have that life that I lost, would lose if even on the first failure I will stop. So, I’m writing this Right now so that when I see my grades at the end of the school year it will remind me of this scene, and that because of this scene I’ve resolved myself to fight to have the honor of being a doctor, or when I get down, how this scene has let me up more than anything or anyone ever did