In medicine you learn a lot of things about the human body, even the mind… how our chemistry plays a role on our reaction our feelings all this i exoected to learn… and is glad that i do…
What shoked me was how i learned a few things about character.
I learned that indeed everything can be solved just by talking about it, i knew this already but what i really learned and experienced ib medicine was that i learned that openess and right timing and choosing your words is needed so you can attain a healthy talk and understanding of what you want and listening too to what the other party wants… its check and balance…
Now i dont know if i could use that un practice but i could surely use that in life right? :)
@kahyehm (twitter and instagram)
the fact that i dont have a friend i could say these things that has been happening now is what makes me so mad about it, i dont have, i cant tell something fully how i feel, what happened just , i just cant get over it … i cant get over that i lost my trust to not one but almost all my friends, i cant say i when ill get over this, im trying im not a bad person, i dont want to live like this when everytime i remember what happened, i need to stop and try to breathe, im not saying im still where i am last semester, im just acknowledging that after what happened last night, im not okay yet, im trying to be, but im not, im far from it, when you realize that someone you tried to open up to was the wrong person, it hurts like hell…i was trying to think that i shouldnt dwell on that but,i just, i was not trusting to begin thats why it hurts more when these things happened, i just, i dont know, i cant even say and you probably dont understand me, i probably lost you at this point, but i just want to let this all out because as i have told you, i dont trust anyone enough for this…thanks
As a kid, i never believed that the earth houses people that are whatever the books describes as “bad”
I never believed in crab mentality
I never believed that promises can be broken
I never believed that people can tell you they love you and then break your heart
I never believed that someone can tell you they accept you, that theyre always there for you only to leave you the first chance things gets hard
I never thought that betrayal can happen outside my TV
I never believed that people can say theyll keep your secret and next thing you know everyone knows it
But as i grew older i learned that this could all happen, i learned it the hardway… im guessing that’s the only way we can learn,cause things like this? You dont believe it until its staring at you, and spitting on your face… its hard but as i grow older i think i wont ever be the kind of person who gets used to it…
I still think its not all people, its just a few people who makes you disappointed with humanity… i still believe that overall its a beautiful life with good friends, good people
Theyll help you climb as high as you can go, and more
Theyll keep your promises
Theyll tell you they love you and they mean it every second
Theyll always be there for you no matter how hard it gets
Theyll never betray you
Theyll keep your secrets
But every time I remember what happened, I just, I can’t even… I don’t know
It’s not pride like other people might think, it’s I’m just not ready, I think I we want to work this out, we could, buti Dont know
I just want to share this page I found, is it really cheesy if I tell you I teared up a little because of this? Hehe :)
While I’m resting now from studying cause I had a really non productive stressful day, I’m watching Greys Anatomy, and it’s about izzie basically, the one when she came back to the hospital for the first time after Denny died and there was the m and m, discussing how he died and they all had a different story line for that, I suddenly paused in a middle of a scene,
This one, this is how it goes
IZZIE: I have 8 million dollars.
CHIEF: So I’ve heard
IZZIE: I can do anything I want.
CHIEF: Just about.
IZZIE: And all I really want to do is a running whip stitch.
CHIEF: My first year as an intern, I had a stable cardiac patient who blew out his lung while I was transporting him to CT. I called in a code, but by the time everyone got there, he was dead. If I’d have put in a chest tube right away…
IZZIE: You made a mistake
CHIEF: I made a mistake. But I stayed. I worked. I learned. I never made that mistake again. If I’d have quit, all I would have had is that life that I lost. Instead I get to save lives. Every day, I get to save lives.
And I don’t know, cause Right now I too am in the verge of quitting, but, this really got me, I literally paused and think things … I don’t know how to explain this, but I don’t know… just… I don’t want to have that life that I lost, would lose if even on the first failure I will stop. So, I’m writing this Right now so that when I see my grades at the end of the school year it will remind me of this scene, and that because of this scene I’ve resolved myself to fight to have the honor of being a doctor, or when I get down, how this scene has let me up more than anything or anyone ever did
I always told you when I’ve read your poems that I don’t have a talent for that, but here it is, feeling poem-ish last night… so…